Still chemo day...even though it is after midnight

Yes, I am still up...and still writing...not sure I am still spelling through.

It suddenly occurs to me that I have not written about prognosis, although this is common knowledge between Hannah and I. Sorry my lovies!

So, statistically, if I do everything they want me to do, I have a 95 percent chance of being cancer free in five years. If I don't do the radiation part, my chances are not much different. If I delay chemo here and then, the stats do not change. If I don't do surgery, the numbers way change. Same if I do surgery but no chemo.

So being rather numbers oriented (yes, my biggest past time is sudoku), I am choosing chemo and surgery. Chemo first to reduce the tumor, and the blood flow to the tumor, so surgery is easier. I will still have a mastectomy on the one, if not both sides, as there are questionable little bits on the other side that will require monitoring and because "balance" is important to me. One of the most common follow-up surgerys women with one-sided breast cancer have is to remove the other breast, not because it is diseased but because the lack of balance and completion of the cancer process is greater than the one saved breast.

So I am very lucky, and feeling pampered and like a big baby. This will not be hard to beat, as it has not spread to any organs except my breasts.

When chemo gets rough, I think of you all and your love and your prayers, and then it is all good! Many, many have suffered much much worse...my prayers are with them.

XXOO